Episode 4 Derry Girls

ACT I EXT. WALKING PATH TO TOWN - DAY

ERIN, MICHELLE, CLARE, ORLA and JAMES all dressed in their school uniformsare walking down the lane to school through the city center.

 

ERIN

Mammy says I need to deal with the Christmas cabinet soon. She told me that the holidays are almost here, like right around the corner. All the while reminding me about how we ate all the snacks.

 

ORLA

And she was quite mean about it too... if I do say so myself.

 

CLARE

I thought you had dealt with that already. I mean we all gave you money and some of our food to cover you.And to fill that cabinet so it was as full as ours were. So why is she talking about it now? And why are you talking to us about it?

 

ERIN

Well...I- I mean we had but then I got hungry. We all know life it is hard.

So I pigged out one day and all those snacks we filled the cabinet with I ate in a day. And she is threatening to lock it for good.

 

ORLA

Throw away the key she said. She said only something special would have to happen for her to reconsider.

 

 

 

JAMES

Can't have that. We have tests before winter break.We need that cabinet for relief and respite. We can stop by Dennis' shop on the way.

 

MICHELLE

Feck that! We have helped you already. You're on your own. And honestly, I can't believe your mum is making you. You don't have money.

 

Erin, Clare, Orla, Michell and James nod. EXT. DENNIS'S SHOP - CONTINUOUS

The shop has a long line of PEOPLE waiting to get in. JENNY is in line talking to her FRIENDS.

 

MICHELLE

Feck, I wonder what's goin' on here?

 

ERIN

I don't know. But we have time. So let's wait and see.

 

Erin, Orla, James, Michelle, and Clare join the line. INT. DENNIS' SHOP CANDY AREA - CONTINUOUS

Erin, James, Michelle, Orla and Clare are standing in front of many bins of candy. DENNIS is waiting to help them.

 

JAMES

 

James looks down and picks up a chocolate bar with a brightly colored wrapper.

 

Is that a Scrumdilumptious Bar? I haven't seen those since I left England. They are amazing. Erin, they are something special and should be it the cabinet. I promise they are worth it.

 

ERIN

Special? Aight, eh how much are the bars?

 

DENNIS

Four and a half punts.

 

JAMES

What-that is robbery. It's only a pound and a half in London. What gives?

 

DENNIS

Well the English pound to the Irish punt, inflation.Look here, you may be a gay but I'm sure you can count.

 

JAMES

I am not gay. And yes I can count.

 

ORLA

Maybe we have something we can give you instead?

 

Orla reaches into her bag and pulls out a clown doll head with an ax stuck sideways in it along with a pinwheel. Erin digs in her bag and pulls out a blank sheet of paper. Clare pulls out a cross from her pocket. Michelle hasa mini Swiss Army knife in the palm of her hand. James looks around nervously.

 

 

 

Dennis looks at the items the kids are offering up to trade.

 

DENNIS

What in the world? Get Out!

 

EXT. DENNIS' SHOP - CONTINUOUS

 

Erin, Orla, James, Michelle, and Clare walk away from the shop and past the Derry sign.

 

JAMES

I can't believe he is charging that much for one of those bars. Even if they are that good that price is outrageous. How can he stand himself doin' that?

 

ERIN

(musing to herself)

Mammy would kill me if I spent that much on anything that was not dipped in literal gold. James says they are good for the cabinet, and I don't have time to search for... special.

 

I mean why do we keep coming to Dennis' shop? Havewe bought anything from him?

 

MICHELLE

Feck Dennis and feck that. No way we have to spend that much money for candy. Are ya kiddin' me? It's candy for fecks sake. I say we show him. We are hiscountrymen. How he could stick it to us like that? Do it as if we're the English.

 

JAMES

(softly) Hey,I'm English.

 

MICHELLE

Git over it, eh. Yeah, we should show him. You can'tdo that to your fellow Irishman.

 

CLARE

I think that is a bad idea. Just let it go and give her money for her family big shop, that is coming up.

 

MICHELLE

(sarcastically)

Sure. That's what we will do.

 

 

 

INT. SCHOOL ASSEMBLY ROOM - DAY

 

SISTER MICHEAL is sitting on a chair next to MISS MOONEY as Jenny and AISLING are onstage singing a nonsensical song about vacations. Michelle, Erin, Clare, Ola, and James blankly stare at the stage in front of them.

 

SISTER MICHAEL

Why do we have to be here for this? Mooney, did they make up this song just to torture us? I can't even ban it as it is not a song from the radio that any...and that is why they asked me about original songs. Well played, ladies.

 

JENNY

(singing)

Vacation is what we wanted. We like scarfs andmitten. We love being so warm and with family.

 

AISLING

(singing)

Vacation is all we ever needed. A few days to spend with family and opening gift. They will be wrapped inbrightly colored paper just for you...

 

Sister Michael stand up quickly her chair scrape the floor. She walks up the podium. Jenny and Aisling step off to the side. Sister Michael looks from side to side.

 

 

 

SISTER MICHAEL

(into microphone)

Thank you, ladies, so much. I don't think we have heard that version of The Go-Go's "Vacation" ever in these halls. Though, it is timely as we are about to start our winter break. I hope all you girls have a stocked holiday cabinet. I do. Dismissed.

 

INT. SCHOOL LIBRARY - DAY

 

STUDENTS are milling around. Michelle sits at a table with Erin, Clare, Orla and James. She hands them each a small square of chocolate.

 

MICHELLE

EH everyone try this.

 

ERIN

Ohhh this is good Mammy would love this. I have never had anything like this. Really kind ofspecial. What is it called?

 

ORLA

Mmmm this is really quite good. And the chocolate isn't bad either.

 

CLARE

This is amazing. Where did you get it?

 

JAMES

Oh my god this is a scrumdilumptous bar. How did you get one of these?

 

MICHELLE

I nicked it from Dennis' of course.

 

CLARE

(Whispers angrily, crossing herself)

You fed me stole candy?

 

MICHELLE

No, I gave you amazing candy.

 

ERIN

They are quite special. Need them for the cabinet.

 

MICHELLE

Yeah they are, but that snot, Dennis, won't sell them at a decent price. So how can we buy them? I say weget some and sell 'em ourselves. We can make some money get other snacks and stick it to Dennis at the same time.

 

CLARE

We can't do that... it's immoral.

 

ERIN

Why not? I say lets do it. A few for the cabinet. Afew for the countrymen. No harm in thinkin' 'bout it.

 

MICHELLE

Good to have you on my side Erin. Dennis' prices are immoral.

 

ORLA

I think you're right... Michelle, it's immoral how much Dennis is chargin' for them.

 

 

 

What?!

 

 

Huh?


CLARE

 

 

ORLA

 

 

JAMES

 

I say we just forget that I mentioned them for the cabinet.

 

CLARE

And I_ say, we just forget about them

altogether.

 

MICHELLE

Feck that... they're just too good. Everyone shouldbe able to have one at a fair price.

 

ERIN

And don't be forgettin' Mammy or me.

 

CLARE

So? None of that will matter if we get in trouble.

 

MICHELLE

Trouble? How many times have we gotten in trouble about this? And we need to show Dennis that the Irish are not ones to mess with!

 

CLARE

(shaking her head and crossing herself. Whispers loudly)

NO!

 

MICHELLE

What the feck? Whatdoya mean no?

 

CLARE

It is immoral! And me ma will kill me.

I say no. While it is amazing candy...

NO! It would be wrong.

 

MICHELLE

Whatever.

 

INT. BUS - DAY

 

GERRY is sitting in the back of the city bus. There are a few PEOPLE sitting in random seats Sister Michael gets on the bus, and walks to the back.

 

SISTER MICHAEL

Gerry? Why are you taking the bus? Car broken down?

 

GERRY

Joe.

 

SISTER MICHAEL

 

Well sometimes it is something. Sometimes... someone. How is Mary and everyone?

 

Sister Michael sits on the aisle seat across from Gerry. She shakes her shoulders before they move down from her ears.

 

 

 

GERRY

I worry about how Mary sees me. I am almost sure shestill loves me. I used to fight against everythingbut now... Joe. I swear I see something in her eyes die every single time I stay quiet. I don't think she accepts me and my choices I want to have a peacefulhome. Sorry... you didn't ask that... my family is great. Wait... why am I on the bus? In a word, Joe.

 

Gerry stares off before sighing.

 

SISTER MICHAEL

So glad that I asked. Have you thought about taking her someplace special?

Like the movies?

 

GERRY

Yeah I tried and... Joe.

 

SISTER MICHAEL

So you just want her to understand and accept you?

 

GERRY

Pretty much.

 

SISTER MICHAEL

Does she like art?

 

GERRY

Yeah, that is one thing we both love.

 

SISTER MICHAEL

There i_s_ the Maplethorpe photography

exhibit at the museum. The paper says it is all about acceptance/

 

Sister Michael pulls the folded paper out of a bag, ruffles the pages to thepage and hands it to Gerry. Gerry looks at the paper for five seconds and hands it back to her. She takes the paper puts it back and pulls the cord.

 

GERRY

Thank you Sister for everything.

 

SISTER MICHAEL

Eh, what else was I going to do?

 

The bus stops. Sister Michael gets off the bus. INT. ERIN'S KITCHEN - DAY

MA MARY is making coffee and AUNT SARAH is sitting at the kitchen counterpainting her nails next to a plate of toast.

 

MA MARY

Sarah what do ya have planned for the day?

 

AUNT SARAH

Oh I don't know sit around here.

 

Aunt Sarah blows on her nails. Gerry walks into the kitchen.

 

GERRY

Sarah, Mary. What are the two of you doing today?

 

MA MARY

Dunno. Sarah says her an' Da are going to the store. I may stay it's not big shop day. Why?

 

GERRY

I thought we could go somewhere. Meet you at the car.

 

Gerry walks out of the kitchen after taking a piece of toast. Ma Mary walks out.

 

EXT. DENNIS'S SHOP - AFTERNOON

 

Erin, Clare, Michelle, Orla and James stand outside of the door. Jenny anda group of her friends walk by slowing down to stare at them. Michelle flips them off. They walk away quickly.

 

ERIN

Sometimes I pray for new friends.

 

CLARE

(to Erin)

While your real ones are still

 

standing here? You say that while we are standing here!

(to Michelle)

And why are we back here? I thought we decided that stealing from Dennis was a very bad idea!

(to all)

Yes, we are poor, but we are n_o_t_ thieves!

 

MICHELLE

I just think we should go inside. And see how many of those English candy bars Dennis has now. I mean if he is gonna play for the other team then-

 

JAMES

Hey!

 

MICHELLE

Shut it. I just wanna go in. I betcha he didn't evenpay that much for them. That he is just overcharging cause he can. Just telling us that inflation, whatever that is, and keeping all the money for himself.

 

CLARE

Fine. I doubt he has anymore. And even

 

if he does we are n_o_t_

 

MICHELLE

stealing.

 

What kind of Irishman are you?

 

Clare, James, Erin, Orla and Michelle go in Dennis' shop.

 

 

 

INT. ERIN'S ENTRYWAY - DAY

 

Mary and Gerry leave. JOE and Aunt Sarah walk into the entryway when the door closes.

 

JOE

Where are they off to?

 

AUNT SARAH

I dunno a flick. When are we goin' to do the big shop?

 

JOE

Shop can wait. He can't take my baby girl to just anymovie. Grab your coat we gotta go.

 

INT. MUSEUM - DAY

 

Ma Mary and Gerry are walking past marble statues and large framed paintings. There are directional signs that reads Maplethrope Black and Whites. They enter a room next to a large Renaissance painting of a battle.

 

Ma Mary is standing in front of a large scale photo on a stand. The picture is of a naked black man sitting on something covered in a white sheet.

 

MA MARY

(whispered)

Is he...naked? Is... is that man naked?

 

Ma Mary walks to the next picture of two topless white men with crowns ontheir heads, dancing. Her eyes widen and her mouth tightens as she shakes her head.

 

The next picture is of a naked white man in a bathtub. She shakes her head. She steps to the next picture. It is a picture of a naked white man holding acamera right above his pelvis area.

 

MA MARY

(whispers)

Are they all... all naked? Do none of them have anyclothes on? Why would he bring me here?

 

Gerry walks the opposite way. He stops in front of a picture of a nude white man holding the rope that a dead rabbit is attached. His head tilts to the side.

 

GERRY

Couldn't the rabbit be alive? Why is it dead?

 

Gerry walks to and stops at a picture of a nude white woman knees to herchest holding onto duct work. He reads the small sign on the wall behind the picture.

 

GERRY

Oh my goodness that is Patti Smith. Look at her, soskinny. She definitely

 

needs some chips or something.

 

Gerry is standing in front of the picture of a naked man hanging upside down. The man is in a bound at his ankles and wrists. There is a chain around his neck that goes to his penis. Also, in the picture is a half dressed man with his hand between the hanging mans legs. It looks like he is holding both thechain and the head of the other man's penis.

 

GERRY

Oh my that has to hurt.

 

Gerry turns to move. Ma Mary walks briskly up to him.

 

MA MARY

(loud whispers)

I am ready to go now... Gerry.

 

GERRY

I am quite enjo-

 

MA MARY

I said now, Gerry.

 

GERRY

Okay. Let's go then.

 

Ma Mary walks briskly out of the exhibit and past sculpures. She walks out the front door and down the stairs. Gerry slowly follows behind her.

 

EXT. MUSEUM PARKING LOT - EVENING

 

Gerry is opening the door for Ma Mary. She gets in the car and crosses herarms across her chest. Gerry runs around the back and gets into the car. Gerry turns towards Ma Mary.

 

MA MARY

Do not speak to me right now. I need... We need toget home I am sure Da is there waiting for us.

 

GERRY

Mary I-

 

MA MARY

I said not a word, Gerry.

 

Gerry backs up the car and drives out of the parking lot.

 

INT. GERRY'S CAR - NIGHT

 

Ma Mary is sitting in the passenger seat. Gerry is driving.

 

MA MARY

So you take me to the naked men picture exhibit. I...

 

GERRY

I'm sorry. I have been wanting to take you out on a date without

interruption-

 

MA MARY

Did you only wanted to take me to the naked men picture exhibit?

 

GERRY

No. I wanted to take you anywhere. I wanted to hold your hand.

 

MA MARY

Gerry, you took me to a naked men pictures exhibit.

 

GERRY

Yes I did. Someone told about it. And how the theme would help.

 

MA MARY

Theme... perversion?

 

GERRY

No, acceptance and being able to be loved no matterwho. The article said it was powerful, and spoke alanguage of love of self and others.

 

MA MARY

When you read about this and thought it would be a good idea?

 

GERRY

Mary, I know you think less of me especially after Ibow to Joe. I can see it in your eyes.

 

MA MARY

There is no truth in that. What I am is shocked thatyou are as calm as you are. The man I dated got engaged to

 

would fight no matter what. I know Da can be a handful and a wee bit stubborn. The house would be a war zone if one of ya didn't yield every time and again.

 

ACT II INT. ERIN'S BEDROOM - EVENING

James, Orla, and Clare are on the bed. Erin is leaning against the wallstaring at the ceiling. Michelle is pacing around the room.

 

CLARE

I can't believe the cost of those bars now. And I am sure it is because someone stole one.

 

MICHELLE

You can't prove that four stupid candy bars is the reason it is now almost twice as much. He is just tryin' to stick it to us, again.

 

CLARE

You can't prove that it isn't either.

 

ERIN

Wait four? I thought you took one. Why didn't you give me a bar or two?

 

MICHELLE

Well I had to see if I was right. That given the taste if they felt cheated. They did, but couldn't see any other way.

 

ERIN

I think they are perfect for the cabinet.

 

MICHELLE

Seriously??? This is more important than a simple holiday cabinet. Why don't you see that?

 

ERIN

Maybe next time we should eat your cabinet bare. Then maybe you'll understand.

 

MICHELLE

Y_o_u_ emptied it, after we filled it. I

know we could make some money for your cabinet and stick it to Dennis at the same time.

 

ORLA

Oooo I love a plan. What are we doin' and when?

 

MICHELLE

Soon. I gotta go and grab somethin'. Come on let's go James.

 

Michelle snaps her fingers at him. They leave the room. Erin, Orla, Clare stare at the closed door.

 

EXT. WALKING PATH TO TOWN - DAY

 

Erin, Clare, Orla, Michelle and James are walking through town and past Dennis' shop.

 

ERIN

So Michelle what did you and James do last night?

 

JAMES

W_e_ didn't do anything. She left me at

home. I coulda stayed with you guys.

 

MICHELLE

Shut it you. And what are you complain for? I had something to do and I didn't want you there okay?

 

ERIN

It's okay... sorry I asked.

 

MICHELLE

Anyway. I did something really cool. I want to talkyou guys later tonight at Erin's.

 

CLARE

What is it about?

 

MICHELLE

The plan. Seriously Clare it's like you don't listen.

 

CLARE

Fine. Tonight. See ya there.

 

Clare, Erin, Michelle, Orla and James walk past the Derry sign.

 

INT. ERIN'S KITCHEN -DAY

 

Mary and Gerry are standing next to the island. Aunt Sarah is at the table eating toast. Joe walks into the room.

 

JOE

What happened to you two yesterday?

 

GERRY

What are you talking about?

 

JOE

How was the movies?

 

GERRY

I didn't say where we were going to the movies

 

AUNT SARAH

Well we had a good time until the bomb threat. We definitely will go back won't we Da?

 

JOE

Wher did you get off doin' that for?

 

GERRY

Joe... because I can. You don't control-

 

JOE

Don't control what? What you do with

my baby girl? If you believe that,

then you are mistaken, Sonny boy.

 

MA MARY

DA!

 

Gerry shakes his head and walks out. INT. ERIN'S BEDROOM - EVENING

Erin, Clare, Orla, James are sitting on and around Erin's bed. Michelle isstanding with a bag laying next to her foot.

 

CLARE

Okay we're here. What is your master plan?

 

MICHELLE

Be nice eh. I say we sell the candy

 

bars at the school for the actual cost. Eh, Jameshow much was it in London again?

 

JAMES

A pound in an a half. But you don't have any bars.

 

MICHELLE

Oh yea?

 

Michelle reaches down and grabs the bag. She reaches in an pulls out fourboxes of candy. Placing them on the cabinet.

 

ORLA

Oooo that looks like a lot of bars. Good for you.

 

ERIN

That's a lot.

 

CLARE

How did you get them? We didn't go into Dennis' shop yesterday or today. And you don't have the money forthem.

 

MICHELLE

Dennis keeps the backdoor to his shop unlocked. Ichecked last night it was open. SO I went in andlooked around. He has ten cases. I took three boxes since he won't miss 'em.

 

CLARE

What?! You stole that? I am telling Mary. This is the last straw! Plan done!

 

Clare jumps up off of the bed and ppeed walks to the door. She walks out. Erin, Orla, James and Michelle follow.

 

INT. ERIN'S KITCHEN - NIGHT

 

Ma Mary, Aunt Sarah, Gerry, Joe are standing around the island. Clare runsin with Orla, Michelle, James, Erin right behind her.

 

ERIN

Mammy, let me-

 

CLARE

Mary, Michelle has stolen four boxes of candy fromDennis and she is gonna sell it at school. Stolen candy, Mary... at school!

 

MA MARY

(to Michelle) Is that right?

 

MICHELLE

Yeah but she didn' tell you the reason why.

 

JOE

Well, spit it out girl what's the reason?

 

MICHELLE

The candy is one and half pounds in London. Here it is three times as much. Though he said it wasinflation. It is wrong to so to your fellow countrymen.

 

JOE

Yeah, that's wrong to do.

 

MICHELLE

Then when we went back it was even higher. The he said it was lack of inventory. But that was a lie. I couldn't prove it before but when I went back last night-

 

MA MARY

Wait how did you get in?

 

MICHELLE

The back door is unlocked. So, he had cases upon cases of it. I took three boxes to sell them.

 

MA MARY

Be that as it may, you stole that candy, and you can't sell it.

 

JOE

And why the hell not? He is overchargin' and lyingabout it. I say good on ya' stick it to the man.

 

GERRY

Well they can't do that. Since if they are caught thecourts won't care about that, at all.

 

Joe stares at Gerry. Gerry just stares back.

 

JOE

Like you would know anything about standing up foranyone but yourself.

 

MA MARY

Da! Gerry's right. They have to take it all back.Take it back and hope no one finds out!

 

JOE

Stealth. You girls need to use stealth.

 

MICHELLE

We need to change into something black and stealthy.

 

Erin, Orla, James, Michelle and Clare turn and leave the kitchen.

 

INT. ERIN'S BEDROOM - NIGHT

 

James, Clare and Michelle stand around Erin's bed as she pulls out all the black clothing she has. Orla walks in and dumps an armful of clothing onErin's bed. Erin and Orla pull apart the clothes and they have three tee shirts, one button down, a pair of jeans, two skirts, slacks, a tutu and a body suit.

 

JAMES

Do you have anything else? Like maybe Gerry has something I can wear... or Joe?

 

MICHELLE

Shut it. You will wear something from here.

 

The girls grab quickly at the clothes. James looks at the bed his shoulders fall as he grabs the tutu and body suit.

 

JAMES

Seriously?

 

MICHELLE

Don't make me come over there! Put. It. On. Then wewill decide how we are gonna do this.

 

They all walk out. They walk back in dressed in their clothes. James forearms and calves are showing.

 

CLARE

Good. I say we go over there and you, Michelle, open the door and put it back. The rest of us will stand outside and keep watch.

 

MICHELLE

Naw, one of you is comin' with me. I don't care who, but one of you are.

 

ERIN

I'll go since it was Mammy's cabinet that started this whole mess.

 

They all walk out Michelle at the end picks up the bag with the candy on the way out.

 

INT. ERIN'S ENTRYWAY - NIGHT

 

James, Orla, Michelle, Erin and Clare walk towards the door.

 

MA MARY

Put it back and come back here. And we will never speak of it again.

 

JOE

Stealth, girls. Stealth. Walk softly but quickly. Youhave right and God on your side. But remember... stealth.

 

Erin, Orla, James, Michelle and Clare leave the house. Walking towards Dennis' shop.

 

EXT. WALKING PATH TO TOWN - NIGHT

 

CLARE

I don't know what you were thinkin'.

 

MICHELLE

I was thinkin' that you had my back and felt the same way I did.

 

CLARE

How could you? I said over and over not to do this.

 

MICHELLE

Whatever. I don't regret it. We could've made a lot of money.

 

ERIN

It doesn't matter why or how. All that matters is we get it back and go home and forget this all happened.Shhhh we are gettin' close.

 

MICHELLE

Not likely to forget this!

 

ERIN

SHHHHH!

 

 

 

EXT. DENNIS' SHOP BACK ALLEYWAY DOOR TO SHOP - NIGHT

 

Standing next to the large bin Erin,James,Michelle,Clare and Orla are dressed in black. The doorway to Dennis' shop a large trash bin. Michelle walks over and opens the door.

 

MICHELLE

See told ya, he doesn't lock his doors. Just beggin'to be taken for a ride.

 

 

 

What?!


JAMES

 

 

MICHELLE

 

Anyway, this is how I got the boxes in the first place.

 

CLARE

And you sound so proud of 'urself.

 

ERIN

Can we just get it done before someone...

 

FIONNULA walks down the street dressing in karate gear with a yoga mat. Shestands like she is about to turn right when she stops and looks at James, Erin, Michells, Orla, and Clare.

 

FIONNULA

EH what are ya doin' over there?

 

Fionnula walks over towards Dennis' building.

 

FIONNULA

What are you doin' all dressed in black? Dressed like that and the door wide open. Gonna set fire to hisplace like you did mine?

 

MICHELLE

That was an accident. You shouldn't have such flammable booze with carpetin'. But we are heretrying to right a wrong.

 

FIONNULA

Right a wrong? Let's see about that.

 

Fionnula yells for Dennis over and over until a light comes on in an upstairs window. Dennis leans out of the window wearing a white tank top.

 

 

 

DENNIS

EH what's with all the racket down there?

 

FIONNULA

These kids are stealing from ya. Jus' thought youshould kno'. Shall I walk on or stay here while you call their parents and get down here?

 

Dennis leans out the window and sees Erin, Michelle, Clare, Orla, and James standing with their arms folded.

 

DENNIS

Yea stay with 'em. Imma call all their parents and be right down.

 

Dennis walks out of the door next to the door that is wide open. His robeis loosely tied. Fionnula is standing to the right of Michelle,Erin, James, Orla and Clare.

 

DENNIS

What is going on out here... what have you got in the bag?

 

MICHELLE

Nothin' you need to worry about. Just go back inside and we will be on our way.

 

FIONNULA

Oh no you don't.

(to Dennis)

I would make her empty that bag.

 

DENNIS

Not until their parents come, Fi. We hav' to waituntil their parents come. Not like when we came up and anyone could tell us what to do.

 

FIONNULA

Miss those days...

 

DENNIS

Ya me too.

 

Ma Mary, Gerry, Grand da Joe,DEIDRE and GERALDINE walks up.

 

MA MARY

What's going on over here?

 

JOE

Yeah why'd you call us all out here?

 

DENNIS

Fi, caught this lot stealing from me.

 

Dennis grabs the bag from Michelle turns it upside down and four boxes of scrumdilioumpious bars fall onto the ground.

 

DEIDRE

What did you do?

 

MICHELLE

It's not what you think ma...

 

DEIDRE

I think you stole candy from Dennis.

 

MICHELLE

Yeah but way earlier.

 

GERALDINE

Clare, what is the meaning of this? Come here!

 

Clare walks swiftly to her mother's side.

 

JOE

I told you stealth.

 

GERALDINE

You knew about this? And you didn't call us?

 

MA MARY

Yes, but I thought that if the girls could just putthe candy back it would all be ok. They took it was a good reason.

 

JOE

Dennis is sticking it to the kids by overchargin'the kids for the British candy. Said it was what? Inflation.

 

DENNIS

Yeah I did. I was gettin' short on supply so I raised the prices.

 

JOE

She took them to sell 'em at a reasonable price. Shetook them to show her countrymen that she cares about 'em, unlike you.

 

MA MARY

Da!

 

DEIDRE

I am just wondering how did you get in to take them in the first place?

 

MICHELLE

The door was unlocked. I checked the knob and it just opened to the stock room. Then I saw that he has tencases and knew he wouldn't miss three boxes.

 

GERALDINE

You were gonna sell stolen candy at school?

 

CLARE

Same thing I said ma.

 

DEIDRE

Wait... you just opened the door? It wasn't locked?

 

MICHELLE

I swear ma, I jus' opened the door.

 

DEIDRE

Dennis, what were ya thinkin'? Charging as much asyou do and leavin' the door unlocked. That's just not thinkin' right.

 

GERALDINE

Yeah that doesn't make sense and was it unlocked now, girls?

 

Michelle, Clare, James, Orla and Erin nod their heads.

 

ORLA

Yeah that's how she got the first ones yesterday.

 

ERIN

It just opened up, Mammy. And we woulda been able to put it back but Fionnula walked up and calledDennis.

 

FIONNULA

I had no idea that you girls were putting it back. or that you don't lock your doors at night, Dennis. What is wrong with ya? Guess you want people to take your stuff. I have to say that you are quite lucky or it could've been worse.

 

MICHELLE

It's ok, Fionnula I understand. We set your apartment on fire. I hope this takes some time off our being banned.

 

FIONNULA

Ha.

 

 

 

JOE

Yeah, you should be thanking those girls. Instead ofmaking them into the criminal that you are, charging the

 

way you do.

 

MA MARY

Maybe next time lock your door and this won't happen again. I mean a wee girl took a couple of boxes of candy. Next time you might not be that lucky.

 

CLARE

I mean we were just tryin' to do the right thing. We didn't want you to stick it to everyone again. Simply because you didn't have four boxes of candy.

 

DENNIS

All of you get out!

 

INT. ERIN'S HOUSE KITCHEN - NIGHT

 

Erin and Orla are sitting at the kitchen island with their heads in theirhands. Sarah walks in and sees them sitting there.

 

AUNT SARAH

What is going on with you two? You look like you both lost your best friend.

 

Erin and Orla look over at Sarah.

 

SARAH

It'll be ok.

 

She hands both girls a square of chocolate. Erin and Orla look at it before putting it into their mouths.

 

ORLA

 

Scrumdiddlyumptious.

 

Erin looks at Orla and shakes her head. Orla smiles with her head tilted to the side as she pets the